Re: hmm....birthdays...
Simich the Anti-Chris (crsimic@ilstu.edu)
Sun, 07 Feb 1999 03:39:20 -0600
Mike42082@aol.com wrote:
> In a message dated 2/6/99 8:09:41 PM Eastern Standard Time, abra@post6.tele.dk
> writes:
>
> << I have NO idea if I´m older or not... But I totally agree with
> Emily here... When I was 16 and went to highschool I thought everything
> was cool and funny, but looking back I hate who I was and some of the
> things I did... (though saying over the internal speakers that our
> headmaster was a goat was kind of fun...)
> >>
>
> Well, I think I'm qualified to comment here since I am 16. No, it isn't the
> greatest time of my life. I go to school at 7 in the morning. I leave school
> in the evening between 5 and 9 (I think that's 17-21 o'clock for our overseas
> members). And no, I don't get paid to put in a 14 hour day. You see, we've
> been brainwashed that if you don't have several hours of extracurricular
> activities, then even a student that has higher than a 4.0 average won't get
> into college. I'll admit, I am a bad example to represent all students, but
> we all live in the same world. We have no free time, and what little time we
> do have when we get home is dedicated to hours of homework. And teachers have
> the audacity to ask me why I almost fall asleep in class.
>
> Oh, but it doesn't end there.
>
> Knowing that I want to pursue a career in writing, I have come to understand
> that I need to get a jumpstart on my future more than most other careers in
> order to at least survive in the world. And thus, those wee hours in the
> morning when I can't get to sleep are devoted to writing. For the time being,
> it's a good therapeutic solution to not having anyone there to listen.
> Personally, I thought schools had guidance counselors for this type of thing,
> but when your school which is in excess of 2000 students, 5 ladies sitting
> behind a desk don't help much. (Oh, and did I mention that my school capacity
> was built for only 700 students? Oh yes, the marvel of overcrowding. It's a
> great way to learn about the real world.)
>
> There is no way for me to know how you guys will receive this letter. Perhaps
> you will believe I am an over-achieving student, or perhaps the common
> description of teenage manic-depression will be noted in a follow-up post.
> But let me clear that up.
>
> Yes, I am a teenager. Yes, I over-react. And yes, I do think that the age of
> 16 is terrible. But, you know what? I don't see any of that. I don't care
> about any of that. And reality, no matter how much I can internally change
> it, won't change for me. Life goes on.
>
> Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da.
>
> Mike
>
> (psychoanalize that one for yourselves)
I couldn't really relate to this reality at the age of sixteen. Yes, I was in
an overcrowded school that had a shitty administration, but that was really the
pinnacle year of my life. The turmoil didn't begin until I left for college. You
get forced out of the small fish bowl into a two thousand gallon tank. There are
people all around me right now that don't understand what I am about, and they
never will. Most of them have come from backgrounds with a lot of money, or they
refuse to accept different viewpoints due to either ignorance or apathy. Being
sixteen was a time of innocence where no one really cared about what was going
on. Everything that we did was fun. The extracurricular activities that I chose
had a purpose - they interested me. It was not like I was forced to participate
in theater or choir. I wanted to make the best of the hand that I had been
dealt. Along with a few close friends (and a few alternating substances), they
were what helped me maintain my sanity throughout all of the pressure. Now that I
am a bit older and into a more specified field of study, I don't have the luxury
of those extracurricular activities due to time constraints. Most of my friends
are back at home, and if they aren't there they reside thousands of miles away,
studying stuff that I will never understand. This is not to say that I would ever
want to go back to being sixteen years old. We all grow older for a reason, but
when I re-read Catcher in the Rye last year, I understood all too well what
Salinger was saying. I felt that Holden Caufield's character was directed at me.
Getting older is a bitch. Feeling the weight of more responsibility is even
worse. Hold onto your youth. It's the only thing left that you can truly call
yours, and when they take it away, make sure you don't go down without a fight.
It's the only way to maintain your sanity.
Simich